Shawn is three months

I can't believe my little man is three months old already! Where has the time gone, obviously way to fast gosh dangit. I tell him all the time to stop growing up so fast, it's just not fair. And the fact that he is a HUGE baby doesn't help. HE weighs 18 lbs and is 26.5 inches tall. Jr weighed 18 lbs at one year old! And he only weighs 5 lbs less then Samantha.
He is a wonderful baby, happy as can be and just the best addition to complete our family. I couldn't have asked for anything better. His big brother and sister LOVE holding him and making him laugh. And I love watching it. It's so heart warming to see my kids play together.

At a loss

I think this is the most upset, depressed, down, whatever you want to call it, that I've been in years. I don't want to talk about it though.
On a side note Jr is staying at the fair with my mom and sister. He loves spending time with my family, doesn't matter where they are just that he's with them.

I don't get it

Just when I start feeling like things might be looking up I get hit with a ton of shit. In this case it's bills. Our electric bill because we had the old house also is 745 bucks.! Our gas bill is 300 also because of the old house. Oh and I got an explanation of benefits from our old insurance company for Shawn's hospital stay, that was 50 THOUSAND dollars. I am so scared to see what the actual bill is from our new insurance company since it's a PPO. So much for things looking up. I don't know how were expected to make a living for our children when were being raped by medicals bills and just bills in general.
I HATE THIS SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh okay done venting, I might go cry now.

Saturday

Let's see what do I need to do today.

1. Laundry
2. Vacuum
3. Make the kids beds back up since I washed their sheets
4. Unpack some more boxes
5. Go with Steve to clean my parents pool
6. Maybe see if the kids and I can go to the fair to see my sister, scratch that were going tomorrow
7. Oh yeah, shower....lol

I think that's about it. I really should get off my butt and go do it huh. Maybe while Steve is cleaning the pool I'll take Shawn and go for a walk around the block. Hope everyone is havign a great weekend.

Hmmmm

So every school or daycare that I've looked into about possibly working there as some type of assistant wants at least 12 ce credits. I've always wanted to be a teacher but have put my wants aside. I'm also realistic and now that with three kids and no one to watch them it's not really something I can do. But I'm thinking that maybe I can do it part time online. Just a thought, not jumping into anything because I can't financially right now but now that the possibility is there I might look into it later.
On a side note. I started getting chest pains again today. It better not be because I went walking. But let me tell you pushing a 4.5 yr old and a 1.5 yr old in a double stroller is hard and then carrying Shawn in my carrier. I had a good work out with that even though it was a short walk. I have a feeling it has to do with my weight. When i get heavy I start getting chest pains and well I'm slowly gaining weight. I hate my body. Why can't I just stay at the weight after I have a baby and not gain only loose. Every time I pop a kid out I do GREAT and loosing all the baby weight but after about two months it always creeps back up. I hate my body. I am so scared of ending up obese. But man I have no motivation to get off my ass and do anything about it. I just let it get to me and get me down and that's it. Ugh I make myself sick sometimes.
Okay done with the pitty party. I think it's bed time now.

Happy 21 months Sam!

Happy 21 months Samantha!

She is just the best little girl I could have ever asked for, Yes the girl gives me a freaking heart attack every day because she is such a mischievous little thing but I love her to death. She is so sweet and loves her brothers and Daddy and she still is a mommy's girl :) So I just had to come on here and tell her Happy 21 months baby girl! Can't beleive she's almost TWO!

Jr's First Soccer Practice

Today at 4 Jr had his first soccer practice. It was a mad dash before hand to get a ball, shin guards and cleats. Yes, bad mommy waited until the last minute to get his supplies. Well I didn't get a call from the coach until Monday so I really didn't have that much since I didn't have a car. Any ways. three stores later we got all the stuff he needed :) He was soooooo CUTE at practice. When the coach would ask a question all the kids would raise their hands and Jr would look around and raise his too even though he had no clue what the coach was talking about. He ran and ran and ran it was awesome, and the boy still is full of energy! Each of the kids told the coach what they thought their team name should be and then he picked from a bag. So Jr's team name is Soccer Monsters....lol I am in charge of the banner, I have to say I'm proud of myself for volunteering to help. I'm trying to get myself out there a bit more. Here are a couple pictures from his practice today!

Stretch!

Go Jr!

Hi fives



All done, going home